Results are not just life

 Results are not just life

If we look at the topic of how to determine the future, we can understand the theory of ‘real self’ and ‘ideal self’ of famous psychologists like Carl Rogers.

Based on the recently released SEE results, 61.81 percent of students are eligible to be admitted to class 11.

The author says that it is necessary to plan according to one’s interests and abilities.

The results of the Secondary Education Examination (SEE) have just been released. According to the National Examination Board, about 61.81 percent of the students who participated in the examination this year have succeeded in getting a ‘grade’ suitable for studying in class 11.

This year, 38.19 percent of students have been ‘non-graded’ and will not be admitted to class 11. That is, 61.81 percent of students have got the opportunity to move forward for higher education, while the rest have to wait for the chance exam or wait for a year.

Heartiest congratulations to all the brothers and sisters who have had the opportunity to move forward with excellent results and good luck for the future! Also, good luck in advance to the students who have not been able to get the expected results this time and have to prepare for the exam again!

Many students must be happy when the results are good, they must be sharing sweets. The congratulations received from relatives and friends must have increased their happiness graph even more.

However, it is natural for some students to be worried about having to take the exam again. The question of relatives asking, ‘What was your result?’ is heartbreaking. Seeing posts with friends on social media may make them feel sad and their happiness graph may have gone down. However, some students may be happy that they got the opportunity to take the exam or that they passed subjects like Mathematics and English.

As a psychologist, this article is dedicated to all the students who are taking the SEE. It is dedicated to the students who have succeeded or are preparing for the exam again and their parents.

From the school level to the time of the results, you must have heard it repeatedly, ‘Life is not determined by the SEE results alone.’ I also completely agree with this statement.

I still remember, in my childhood, Hari (name changed), who always got excellent marks in school and came home adorned with garlands and garlands, gradually fell into alcoholism and passed away last year due to stomach cancer. On the other hand, Sante (name changed), who was considered the weakest in the village because he failed, today got a government job and is living a happy life in his own house in the market with his family.

Not all of us have the same nature and circumstances. Our desires and dreams are also not the same. Therefore, everyone’s future after SEE is also different. The support he gets in the time after, the friendship he makes, the family and school environment he gets, as well as the economic and social situation determine the trajectory of his life.

In addition, natural and man-made unexpected events that occur daily in life (such as losing a relative, having an accident, etc.) can also take a completely different turn. Many similar happy and sad situations came in the lives of Hari and Sante mentioned above, which changed their paths.

Dear brothers and sisters, therefore, the discussion of ‘What to study, what subject to study, which school to study?’ or ‘What kind of person will I become in the future?’ is not only after passing SEE, but it is a topic that we should think and ponder over from school education onwards.

Where and what you study after SEE will depend on your family, social, economic and geographical environment. This article focuses on how to prepare and plan for your future in a balanced way, rather than saying ‘If you study this subject, there will be a demand for this profession in the future’.

I remembered a conversation I had with my childhood friend again. He used to say that when I saw Salman Khan playing the role of a policeman in a film, I wanted to become a policeman. When I saw a company manager sitting on a swivel chair and working on a laptop in another film, I thought, ‘Ah, I have to become a manager.’

But my friend today is neither a policeman nor a company manager. But, in the profession he is in, he is happy, creative and full of confidence. Well, let's not explain too much about my friend. What I am trying to raise is, did my friend have the skills, interests and foundations to become a policeman and a manager in that childhood? They were just external attractions that were quickly impressed during adolescence. That is why he is on a completely different path today.

Therefore, when looking at the issue of how to determine the future, we can understand the theory of 'real me' and 'ideal me' of famous psychologists like Carl Rogers. 'Real me' is who you really are now, your abilities, interests, experiences and current situation. On the contrary, 'ideal me' is your imagination of who you want to be or what you should be.

If there is a big difference between your 'real me' and 'ideal me', you may feel dissatisfaction and anxiety. For example, if a student likes to play with electronic devices from a young age, it becomes a way of spending his free time, and he has good knowledge in mathematics, science and physics, then he is more likely to do well in the field of engineering in the future.

However, if his ‘ideal self’ is to become a doctor based on good grades, due to family expectations and societal pressure, he will not study If you can do it but cannot enjoy your career in the future, can this person not be happy? This means that the effect of the gap between the real me and the ideal me can be easily understood.

When we can recognize our inner interests and abilities and build our ‘ideal me’ accordingly, then our lives become more balanced and happy. After SEE, it is necessary to think about whether the subject or field you choose is in line with your real abilities and interests. Making decisions based solely on external attractions or imitation of others can lead to regret in the future.

In this context, another famous psychologist, Mihaly C.’s ‘flow theory’ is also equally important. ‘Flow’ refers to a state of being so absorbed in a task that you lose track of time, completely focused and enjoying the task. This state occurs when a task is neither too easy nor too difficult for you – that is, there is a balance between the challenge and your skill.

When the challenge is much greater than your skill, anxiety arises. When the skill is much greater than the challenge, you feel lazy. However, when the challenge and skill are in balance, then there is an experience of ‘flow’. For example, if you are an introvert, you do not have the skills to speak confidently and impress people in front of people, but your responsibility is that of a trainer, in such a situation you are more likely to feel a lot of anxiety about work.

On the contrary, if you have the ability to impress large groups and educated people, but you are working only with a group within a certain circle, then you feel lazy. Here, you have more skills than the challenge you have to do.

Similarly, if you have good speech, you are working in a large group according to your interests, then your work will flow. That is, there will be ‘flow’. You can establish yourself as a good speaker in the community. You are creative in work, you do not get tired of working, do not feel lazy, and you are comparatively less anxious.

Therefore, student brothers and sisters, what subject you choose in higher education or what profession you will adopt in the future is important. If you pursue a field that suits your interests and abilities, you will be able to experience ‘flow’ in your studies and later in your work. This will make you more productive, satisfied and happy.

Therefore, find out your real interests, abilities and clear goals for the future. Focus on the process rather than the result. Sometimes a person may be confused about their abilities and what they want to become in the future. As a result, questions like how to prepare? How to choose subjects? How to follow the path of their imagination or ideal? may arise in their mind.

In such a situation, it is appropriate to take the help of a skilled counselor and psychologist. Experts use available psychological resources and materials to help identify the relationship and gap between your ‘real self’ and ‘ideal self’.