Childhood Dashain: That unforgettable dance

Childhood Dashain: That unforgettable dance

Udit Narayan Jha used to return to his home in Bhardaha during Dashain. And he would sing songs at the cultural program of Kankalini Temple.

Dit Narayan Jha used to return to Bhardaha to sing songs at the cultural program of Dashain and the author heard his live singing for the first time.

In childhood, Dashain is not just a festival. It is a time of colorful dreams, excitement and mystery of life. Be it the Tarai or the hills, whether a person celebrates Dashain or not, there is a separate excitement in Dashain.

Perhaps I was studying in class five at that time. For a child's mind, at that age there was a limit to courage and imagination - where fear and curiosity, desire and discipline, fun and fear were all mixed.

On the morning of Mahanavami, the courtyard of the house was still shining with the sun. Dashain fair in Madhesh. Clay idols were fun everywhere. Jalebis and other sweets, balloons and toys were offered at the fair... In childhood, that was the most important thing. I held my father's hand. We walked towards the Kankalini temple in Bhardaha, where the biggest fair was held.

The crowd on the way, the hustle and bustle of the market, the dust, the rhythm of the drums, all these filled my childish mind with excitement. I was experiencing every sound, color and smell.

The scene as I entered the temple premises was incredible. The ragas were standing in a row, their white dhoti dyed with turmeric on their backs, garlands of flowers on their shoulders. The hustle and bustle of the crowd, the light smoke of the incense sticks, the fleeting smell of blood during the sacrifice—all of it made the atmosphere mysterious. Hundreds of goats and sheep were sacrificed throughout the day.

But people were eager to see the real Raga. Around 2 pm, the Raga sacrifice began. The Raga were arranged in a designated area outside the temple. They would come from inside the temple with swords, sacrifice only one Raga at a time, and then….. The sight of each raga being cut off also created fear in my childish mind.

While watching the sacrifice, I also looked at my father's face repeatedly. His seriousness and respect instilled a sense of stability in my childish mind.

After watching the sacrifice, we reached our ancestral home, Goithi. The path of bamboo slats, the river crossing with open sandals, the edge of the pond and the mango trees on the edge... everything seemed to welcome us. The courtyard, the smell of soil, the taruwa, bharua, and adauri cooked by my grandmother all gave my childish mind a sense of security and warmth.

We ate dinner there, but we did not spend the night there. Our hearts were filled with desire - to watch the cultural program all night. We returned to Bhardaha again.

At that time, Udit Narayan Jha had become a famous singer. He used to return to his home, Bhardaha, during Dashain. And he used to sing songs in the cultural program of the Kankalini temple. That day, I heard his song live for the first time.

That voice filled my childish mind with an amazing sweetness. I didn't know the singer's name, but my father and brothers said, 'This is Udit Narayan.' When I remember it today, I feel like what a blessing that moment was. I got to see such a famous person in person at a young age. That too, standing next to my father, without any tickets or any barriers.

Our desire did not stop yet. After the song ended, we set off on a journey. We had to reach Bhantabari via the Koshi Barrage. We were walking for about 10-12 kilometers. It was a dark night, the road was dusty. Here and there was a little light from the street lamp, here and there a glimmer of moonlight. My father, brother and many other villagers were also with us. We walked for hours. Desire and enthusiasm did not let us get tired. Excitement overcame fear. The only fear was that I would be lost in the crowd. I was holding my father's hand tightly. The only thing I knew was that if I let go of this hand, I would be lost.

When we reached the fair, there was a big pandal, a statue of a goddess, twinkling lights, musical instruments and drums. All these created an atmosphere of celebration. Men dressed as women performed songs and stories. Humor, compassion, love - all mixed. Like a modern movie in the eyes of a child.

The story was presented along with the song - someone's separation, someone's love, someone's humor, someone's compassion. Sometimes the audience would laugh, sometimes they would clap, sometimes their eyes would water. I thought - this is more fun than a movie. Instead of watching on the screen, here people speak directly, sing, dance, laugh and cry with the audience.

The fear of getting lost in the crowd, the strength to hold your father's hand, the unbridled curiosity, all filled the child's mind with wonderful sensations. Staying awake all night, walking, these became invaluable moments of childhood. Dashain in Madhesh was not just about entertainment. The tradition of sacrifice, jamara, and filling the khoich, all of these were showing the cultural and religious heritage of the society.

The fair connected the society. People met, news was exchanged. Every year when Dashain comes, my mind races back to the past. As a doctor, today I spend my days with patients, engage in social service, and write books, but when I hear the name of Dashain, my mind suddenly returns to my childhood, where I held hands with my father and went to the fair. I was afraid of getting lost in the crowd, but the power of desire made me forget my fatigue.

Dashain is still different in Madhesh. Here, the custom of observing Navratri fasts is still there, there is a tradition of worshipping at the shrine. There is a custom of bringing flowers, dancing jhijiya, and filling the khoich in the temple of the goddess to protect against evil eyes. There is a belief in sacrificing and participating in the procession collectively. Dashain in Madhesh carries not only faith, but also the color of culture, the nature of society, and the fickleness of a child's mind.